Plan Ahead to Reduce Stress for You and Your Loved One
Many caregivers are caught unprepared when they have not considered where they are going with their care receiver. Unfamiliar restaurants or places they are not used to can pose challenges. Thinking about what to expect at your destination can help minimize potential problems.
Imagine this scene. Have you experienced something like this?
You are invited to meet a family member at a restaurant. It is only your third time going out to eat with your care receiver, who uses a walker since numerous surgeries and rehab stays. Your previous experience with restaurants with your care receiver was parking in a small parking lot, getting out of the car, walking a short distance to the front door, and sitting at a table in a small neighborhood restaurant. You had not thought about the large entry store and the long walk to the dining room at this restaurant. In addition, no one has thought about getting a table close to the dining room entry.
Managing Sensory Overload
One significant concern for some older adults is their sensitivity to noise and the potential for them to become agitated by all the activity around them. Asking staff for a table closer to the entrance or against a wall tends to dampen noise and reduce the distraction of normal restaurant activities.
Planning for Comfort
By thinking about these factors in advance, caregivers can create a more comfortable and enjoyable experience for their care receivers, reducing stress for them, you, and others during outings.
Although this blog refers to restaurants, consider the same ideas for many outings.
Be Kind
You will make mistakes and feel guilty that you “should have known better.” Be kind to yourself. Learn from each experience. Every caregiving day and event is different, just as every day for our loved one is different.
One Last Tip
Are you carrying bottled water, wet wipes, needed medications, and any necessary incontinence supplies with you every time you go out? How about a bag of everything but medication left in the car at all times? What else might you need?
Editors Note: An experience with my husband and our adult son, meeting us for lunch after a short trip from Austin, prompted this blog. Our main outings had been to doctor’s offices and other medical appointments. Our son and I felt so guilty after this experience because we had not thought about how difficult this restaurant would be to navigate. “Shoulda, coulda, woulda.” We agreed it was a learning experience. My husband was gracious, and we gave up the guilt because it did not help either of us. We can even laugh about it now. I am relearning entry into a more “normal” way of life, although my husband’s illness and physical disabilities mean we are re-defining “normal.”
by Zanda Hilger, M. Ed., LPC – Founder, FamilyCaregiversOnline
We hope this information is helpful to you in the important work you do as a family caregiver.
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